Being a good friend vs. Being comfortable

Disclaimer: I realize that as I post this some people have had some friends that did things that were actually harmful and I do not promote sticking around in dangerous situation where the person who is doing wrong can be physical or deeply emotionally abusive.  I am just referring to ourselves being selfish because we don't want to be around something simple bc we don't feel like dealing iwth it.

Romans 15:1-2 - "Now we who are strong ought to bear the weakness of those without strength and not just please ourselves, Each of us is to please his neighbor for his good, to his edification." NASB.   

         I love this verse but just to paraphrase it the Message says it this way.... "Those of us who are strong and able in the faith need to step in and lend a hand to those who falter, and not just do what is most convenient for us. Strength is for service , not status. Each one of us needs to look after the good of the people around us, asking ourselves, "How can I help."

This verse speaks volumes to me.  I had a situation with a friend where I thought I was doing the right thing by not being her friend (or for terminology I have heard used to today) I was doing the "godly" thing.  I am currently doing a study on friendship and what it truly is according to the Bible.  These two verses tell me that I was wrong about my attitude with my friend.  The godly and Christ-like thing to do would have been to stick by her when she started having problems.

  Let's break these two verses down piece by piece......

   "Now those of us who are strong ought to bear the weaknesses of those without strength...(or those who falter)     

              basically what this means is that we who know what is right and are strong in our faith should be helping others (not just those who are unsaved but also our brothers and sisters in Christ.  We are all going to falter it is inevitable.  Would I would a friend to leave me when I made a mistake or was having a hard time in my life and doing wrong things? NO! So why should I do that to anyone else???  If I am striving to be Christ-like then shouldn't I strive to act how he would in every situation?? I am not saying you have to be glued to this person hand and foot, but we should be there for them to help them and guide them and encourage them.  Do you think someone will change what they are doing if we are constantly beating them down???

        NOw onto the second part of the first verse..."and not just please ourselves"......I think this pretty much speaks for itself.   

          Would I rather be Christ-like or would I rather rid myself of the situation and be comfortable of the situation.  I know in my situation a few years ago I skirted around this part of the verse by saying "God you don't know how much it hurts me or what they have done to me or how uncomfortable it makes me"  Once again my unChristlike attitude made its way to the front and I put everything else except my comfort on the back burner.  Christ didn't put us on this Earth to be comfortable, He put us on this Earth to be Christ on Earth, a light to everyone. 

     Next the verse says, "Each of us is to please his neighbor to his good, for his edification."  I really like how it says Strength is for service not for status.  This phrase right here is so strong to me because so many times I have thought of myself as "someone special" or better than someone else because I was growing in Christ.  The reality is that if we are strong in our faith we need to serve others with that strength that God has blessed us with.  I know that if I had just acted more Christlike and caring and understanding in my and my friends situation, I could have helped so much more, instead I put her down and and discouraged her and made her feel like a horrible person.  Del Tacket made a good point in the Truth Project. He gave a wonderful example about how he made fun of a girl in his school and the more they teased her the more she began to act the part.  Our words hurt people and if you tell someone they are something long enough they may start to believe it. Our words can be very very detremental.  We should be using our Mouths and Words for edifications.  Our words can be used for good.  If a friend is having a hard time we should be there to help them through it not hurt them during it. Sadly , I had to learn this the hard way.  Christ doesn't care how much they hurt me.  If I am not doing the Christ-like thing I have no room to be complaining.

I guess the main point it that friends are going to mess up, they may do somting that hurts, but we aren't in their shoes and we do stuff that hurts others sometimes also so we can't judge. Point being be there to help your friends and quit using excuses like "GOd you just don't understand how much it hurts" or the like. I understand it hurts I have been there but thats why I can also say, if i had put myself second and the other first I could have caused both of us a whole lot less damage.  Christ clearly tells us to be there for others and be edifying.  Now lets follow it. :)

None of this was meant to sound ranty. Just saying.